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The big idea

Jesus knows what it feels like to lose someone we love, and the same mourning that makes us want to withdraw is the very thing God wants to turn into a miracle and a ministry.

Even Jesus, on the day He learned His cousin John the Baptist was murdered, withdrew to be alone — proof that grief and withdrawal are human, not sinful. But Jesus did not stay there: compassion moved Him back toward people, and the very pain He carried became the setup for feeding thousands. Our mourning, given to God, becomes the ministry and the miracle He wants to work through us.

Point 1 of 6

Matthew 14 shows Jesus's full humanity, not just His divine power.

Pastor Tyshone reads Matthew 14:1-14 and notes that most stories show Jesus doing miracles that require divine power, but this one shows Him grieving like a man. John the Baptist was not just a prophet to Jesus — he was His cousin, and Jesus responds to his murder the way any person would.

We have this idea that because we're not aware that it hasn't happened, just because you're not aware of it doesn't mean it's not taking place

— Tyshone Roland

Point 2 of 6

When tragedy hits, withdrawing is a normal, human response — even Jesus did it.

After hearing the news about John, Jesus withdrew to a desolate place by Himself. Pastor Tyshone connects this to his own withdrawal after learning in 2017 that his brother and seven family members were murdered in a mass shooting, describing how he became cynical toward preaching, worship, and even the goodness of God.

A story from life

Tyshone Roland shares the phone call in 2017 in which his mother told him his brother Jordan and seven other family members had been murdered in a mass shooting.

Point 3 of 6

What looks evil and unjust can still be named as wrong, even when we don't understand why it happened.

Herodias's daughter is manipulated by her mother into asking for John's head, an act Pastor Tyshone calls evil regardless of culture, ethnicity, or reasoning behind it. He ties this to the sick-to-the-stomach feeling many had this week over current events, insisting we can trust the law God writes on the heart to recognize sin.

being called out is the biggest blessing because being called out means you're being called up

— Tyshone Roland

A story from life

Pastor Henry Sneed, now deceased, is remembered for the counsel he gave: 'Wherever you are, be fully there.'

A story from life

Tyshone Roland describes his brother Jordan — 17 Division I scholarship offers, 18 years old — who died stepping in front of a cousin to shield him from bullets.

Point 4 of 6

God's goodness is not predicated on our circumstances.

Pastor Tyshone admits that after his brother's death he questioned whether God was really good, listing the ways people ask 'if He's so good, why...' He insists that God's goodness and faithfulness hold regardless of what we feel, what culture says, or what tragedy comes, because pain has no prejudice and rains on the just and the unjust.

the goodness of God is not predicated on situations

— Tyshone Roland

God is good all the time, and all the time, God is good

— Tyshone Roland

Pain comes in all forms, and pain has no prejudice. It wants everybody

— Tyshone Roland

Point 5 of 6

You can visit a desolate place, but you cannot live there — compassion is what moves you out.

Jesus withdrew but did not stay withdrawn; when the crowds found Him, He was moved with compassion and healed them. Pastor Tyshone names 'compassion fatigue' as a real danger in a world of constant bad news, but says compassion — not charisma or passion — is what turns our eyes back toward other people.

You cannot live in a desolate place. You can visit it, but you can't live there. You can't stay there. You can't reside there

— Tyshone Roland

Point 6 of 6

Mourning is a setup for ministry and for miracles.

The feeding of the thousands (recorded in all four gospels) came directly out of Jesus's grief over John's death — pain was the precursor to the miracle, not a platform. Pastor Tyshone says the same is true for us: whatever we've mourned through, God wants to give us authority in that exact area to minister to others going through it.

A story from life

Tyshone Roland shares a text exchange with his father on the morning of the sermon, in which his father — also preaching that day — urges him to tell the story and declare that God is good.

Take it into your week

Pastor Tyshone frames the charge as moving from mourning to miracles: give God the pain instead of holding onto it as something that belongs to you.

Application

Let yourself grieve, but don't move in
If you're withdrawing from people after a hard season, that's a human response, not a sin, but recognize a desolate place is somewhere to visit, not somewhere to live.
Give the pain to God instead of holding it
Stop believing the pain belongs to you; hand it to God and ask Him for strength rather than reaching for drugs, alcohol, sex, or other temporary fixes.
Let compassion move you back toward people
When compassion fatigue sets in from the constant bad news, ask God to stir compassion in you so you start seeing and praying for others by name instead of only yourself.
Return to community and prayer, don't run from it
When life gets hard, go to church and let people pray for you rather than isolating; Pastor Tyshone says this was the first place he went after his brother's death.
Offer your mourning back to God as a ministry
Whatever you've walked through — divorce, cancer, loss — ask God to turn that mourning into the very thing you'll use to minister to someone else going through it.

Keep going

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